Do it Different?!

Vs Do it Better

Why would you think that…

That you never ever?
That you are always as such?
Can’t?
Can?
Don’t?
Want?
Never?
Always?

You are invited to answer, but really I am talking to myself about the above. Talking to myself in my mind in the semi-dark, half way through whatever the red wine recommendation that was offered by the very attractive employee in this ever-new establishment, which is delightfully close to my apartment. It is a weeknight. I just told my friend, “we never do this enough”, and she says, “so true!” And we mean it, we really do, because do we ever? Do we ever get together enough? No. How could we?

How could we get together as much as we want when we are constantly obligated to so many of the things, like jobs and other relationships and expenses that we chose, but do so burden our schedules as it now feels. Now feels, right now feels, as I am here, sitting here and sipping, and so happy to be, but still tired, or maybe hungry, or perhaps both or dehydrated (?) or none of that or all of it. That I am so enjoying exactly what is going down but also would very much prefer to be home alone, not talking or wearing shoes or…